Honoring the Knots: Why Not Everything Needs to Be Healed to Move Forward
When we think about healing, it’s easy to imagine a finish line: a moment when all the pain is gone, the wounds are closed, and we finally feel "perfect." But the truth is, healing doesn’t mean erasing every scar. Healing means learning to live alongside the places that still ache sometimes with tenderness, not fear. Wholeness isn’t about perfection. It’s about holding all of who we are: the smooth parts, the tangled parts, the parts still learning how to breathe. The knots in our hearts and bodies don’t make us broken. They are part of the story we carry forward, part of the deeper beauty of being human.
Some wounds never fully disappear. Some stories don’t need a neat ending to be complete. Often, being witnessed, seen, named, honored, is enough to free up the energy we need to move forward with our lives. Emotional healing isn’t always about "fixing" what hurts. Sometimes, it’s about allowing our pain to have a rightful place in the tapestry of who we are. Trying to fix everything can actually keep us stuck. It sends the message, "You are not enough until this is gone." But you are already enough. Right here. Even with the knots, even with the unfinished chapters. Inner work is not about erasing the past — it’s about learning to weave the past into your present with self-compassion and care.
Photo by Lawrence Macaron via Unsplash
A simple somatic practice can help you listen to what your body truly needs. Find a quiet space and settle in. Let your breath slow down. Gently scan your body with your awareness, noticing where you feel tightness, heaviness, warmth, or tenderness. No need to judge it, just observe. Choose one area that calls your attention, even if it’s subtle. Place a warm hand there, or simply imagine doing so with your mind. Ask the knot a simple question: "Do you need active healing right now, or just witnessing?" Then listen. Listen with your whole being. Sometimes you’ll feel a sense of softening or release. Other times, you might simply feel a quiet sense of acknowledgment, a whisper of, "Thank you for seeing me." No need to fix, force, or rush. In somatic healing, witnessing alone is often a profound medicine.
You can also explore this through writing. In your journal, reflect on these questions: What parts of me are still asking for healing? What parts of me are simply asking to be honored, just as they are? How does it feel to imagine moving forward with these tender places by my side? Let yourself be surprised. Journaling for healing is not about finding the "right" answers — it’s about creating a sacred space where your truths can land, without judgment. You might find that not every part needs a solution. Some parts simply need your love and steady presence.
Healing is not a race to perfection. It’s an act of radical love to live, to dream, and to move forward even with the knots still woven into your story. True emotional healing asks us to bring our whole selves along, including the strong parts, the weary parts, the parts still becoming. You are not a project to be completed. You are a living, breathing work of art, always unfolding, always enough.
I offer somatic, trauma-informed therapy and consulting for sensitive, neurodivergent women and femme cycle breakers who are ready to realign with their rhythm, reclaim sacred embodiment, and live in alignment with who they truly are.
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ways to work with me:
Online counseling and EMDR/Brainspotting for clients located in Bend, Oregon and the state of Oregon. Click here to schedule a free consultation.
Read more about sacred self therapy here and my approach to working with women with ADHD here.
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